Friend or Foe: Friends Abide in Christ

A Lifelong Struggle With Commitment

Scott Uselman began by inviting us into his personal journey, how he wrestled for years with what it means to follow Jesus. At first, he admits he tried to read the Bible from spite, determined to know enough to prove Christians wrong. Yet, "when I started to read it, the Lord started to show me some things." The first story that caught him was Balaam’s donkey, but the real struggle came later when he tried to accept Christ simply for what he called "fire insurance", doing what it took to avoid hell but not sensing any real lasting change. He testifies:

"It wouldn’t be but maybe even three days later I’d go right back to being the person I was. I couldn’t be good. I just couldn’t do it."

By age 18, he gave up, convinced he just couldn't keep up a ‘good’ front for God. But at 26, after years away from faith, he faced the call of Christ with new seriousness. This time, the commitment felt weightier:

"Somehow I realized that Jesus was expecting me to be serious about Him this time."

He names the fear many of us recognize, commitment that could last a lifetime, well beyond what feels possible at a young age. But even then, Scott Uselman explains, it was only when he started learning what real abiding means that his faith began to stick.

Abiding: More Than a Glance, a Sustained Gaze

Moving to John’s Gospel, he helps us see why abiding isn’t a shallow or passing thing. John writes so we can believe, not a one-time mental nod, but a life fixed on Jesus. Scott Uselman highlights how focusing our eyes in this way is more than just looking: "the way he’s saying it is not just to glance at Him, not just to look at Him, but to have a sustained gaze upon Jesus Christ." He compares this to a classroom, where students watch the teacher work out a problem. Discipleship, for him, is learning by attentive imitation, repeating what Christ does under His guidance.

Scott Uselman notes the distractions that constantly try to move our gaze elsewhere, especially in a world of endless options and opinions. But, as he explains, keeping that fixed attention leads to understanding and change, both in his own life and in his family: "I started to mature. I started to understand the world. It was a benefit to my family because I’m learning from Jesus."

Drawn By the Father: Grace Before Our Reaching

The next truth in John 6 is that coming to Christ always begins with God’s initiative. Scott Uselman makes it clear by describing prevenient grace:

"The grace that goes before, the grace that is opening up the door so that we can maybe hear about the Lord. The Lord is drawing us in."

He urges us to remember that any stirring in our hearts toward Jesus is already a work of God. It is not self-initiated. He addresses common anxieties, we may fear that we or someone we love are simply overlooked, or that God is only looking for the worthy. But, as Scott Uselman testifies, if you even find yourself thinking about Jesus, it is a sign that you are being drawn.

"If you have a thought that is about Jesus, for Jesus, that's from the Lord. That is not something originating inside of you."

He urges us not to become fixated on debates about who is picked and who is not, instead, to focus on how God kindly, persistently, and specifically draws each person in His timing, teaching us all along.

The Bread That Is Life: Feeding on Christ through the Lord’s Supper

Scott Uselman turns to the imagery at the heart of John 6: Jesus as the bread of life. He emphasizes that this is not just metaphor or theological abstraction, but an ongoing reality for followers:

"You have to feed on me. This is a strange thing. He says the one who feeds on me abides in me. It means nibble."

He explains that the verb tense in these verses points to a repeated, ongoing action, not just a past one-time event. Partaking in the Lord’s Supper becomes the moment when we act out this ‘feeding’ on Jesus, not merely as a church ritual but as communion with the living Christ. It's an act of identification and renewal, of grace received again:

"That’s what we did today. We came up into the presence of Christ and we remembered that He sacrificed Himself for our sin and we proclaim we’re proclaiming that He’s coming again. That’s what we’re doing all in one and we’re receiving spiritual grace from Him."

This feeding, Scott Uselman says, is how "those who nibble on me, these are those that I’m going to raise up on the last day.” It’s not about perfection or uninterrupted faithfulness, but about returning again and again, allowing the grace of Christ to become our sustenance.

The Risk of Forgetting: Why Abiding Still Matters

He closes by reminding us why all this matters for our lives and our church right now. If we stop fixing our eyes on Jesus, even for seemingly good things or routines, it is easy to slip into self-guided living. He warns:

"You put your eyes upon Jesus. Some of you might just need to say, 'I need to maybe even deactivate my Facebook for a while.' Or maybe I just need to learn how to train myself every time I feel like looking at Facebook. Maybe I need to open up my Bible app."

Scott Uselman connects the failure to abide not only with individual struggle, but with breakdown across families, churches, and even communities. He believes the spiritual and even social damaging effects are real, seen in statistics and everyday experience. What is needed, he suggests, is a reinvestigation, even a repentance, about what it means to truly abide in Jesus.

He calls us back to a faith rooted in a living, ongoing relationship. Communion, the Word, corporate worship, and silent turning of our gaze, these are all ways we stay friends of Christ and become people who have His life in us.

Living It Out

When we abide in Christ, when we keep returning, when we let ourselves be drawn, when we receive Him at the table, we grow to resemble Him in patience, understanding, and grace. Our families and church are strengthened by this steady presence. Instead of being defined first by failings or doubts, we rest in the truth that His welcome is prior and His grace goes ahead. When we lose track, we simply turn again, feed on Him, and find strength anew.

Questions for Discussion

1. How have you experienced the difference between glancing at Jesus and keeping a sustained gaze, especially in times of distraction or doubt?
2. What does it look like, in your daily life, to recognize and respond to the Father’s drawing?
3. How does regularly participating in the Lord’s Supper help you experience abiding, and what new meaning has it taken on for you after reflecting on this passage?